Funny Shit LIfe
24 September 2019
Anyone who knows me knows I’m a word nerd. It’s practically my job description. Now I’d like to think I’m not a word elitist. Does it make my eye twitch when my manager uses the word conniption for things that definitely don’t invoke a fit of rage? Yes, a little bit. Or when our Digital Marketing Manager throws around the word thespian like it actually means something outside the 16th century? Sure. But you know what? At least we’re using words that aren’t ‘um’ or ‘like’ or any other filler words.
Plus, malapropisms aren’t anything new and even as a founding member of the Word Nerd Society. I’m certainly not safe from using a word one way, only to find out it means something entirely different and don’t even start me on how many times I’ve had to say WED-NES-DAY to myself when planning out my week.
That brings us to this article which is one wholesome collection of people shooting their shot in the word game…and missing by half a mile. We’ve all been there and without Grammarly, we’d probably be there a lot more often.
I feel like there’s a lot more wrong with this statement than the misspelling of male.
Don’t tell my mum, but I love marinara.
To be fair, it does shuffle around the soil.
I’m positive Willoughby Bertie had a very strong Irish accent.
If we want to talk trash about stone fruit, why aren’t we talking about olives? Olives are grapes from hell.
They must be some damn good blueberries.
Mistake or meme? Whatever it is, please stop smelling each other’s colon.
Maybe this isn’t a typo, maybe it’s mean to be a thought-provoking statement about the meaning of life and death and why we’re all here. Or you know, maybe it’s just a typo.
To this, my mum would say ‘get your head out of the gutter’.
As someone who has spoken French most of their life (humble brag), I FEEL this. French is hard.
As someone who also speaks Italian (I know, another brag, sorry), I blame Americans for this one. Parmesan said with an American accent doesn’t sound Italian or English.
I feel like Tattoo Diabetes was made up by conservative parents to prevent their kids from getting inked.
Oh look, more subliminal messaging from my mum. However, I think the real crime here is that you don’t even get a discount for buying two. At $2.50 each, paying $5 for two isn’t a bargain, it’s just maths.
As I said, French is hard but these people were talking about two distinctly different things.
The only trash here is the guy or girl that wrote this tweet.
I would love to be given some tomatoes just maybe not all of them.
Well, incontinence is kind of inconvenient.
Ellen DeGeneres vs. Ellen The Generous
Ellen is generous.
No soup for you.
Words by Emma Roffey
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