30 Things That Make Your BF Go Ape Shit Crazy

09 May 2018

We’re not doubting that you and your boyfriend are truly, madly, deeply in love. But we’re also not doubting that some of the things you do can drive him absolutely batshit cray. The type of cray where he wishes you didn’t look so damn cute in his old t-shirt cos life would be so much simpler if he was living it up as a single man about town. But where did simple ever get you? And would he really last more than a day out there on his lonesome?

Below, we take a look at the things you’re doing that are definitely not getting you the brownie points – but hey, gotta keep them on their toes, right?!

  1. Telling him you want to take him shopping and then making him wait an hour in the change rooms while you show him through your 20 different dress options for Saturday night.
  2. Making him say “I love you” while he’s at work.
  3. When he says it’s time to go and you’re still sitting there in your pyjamas… and then when you’re FINALLY ready you look at what he’s wearing with raised eyebrows and make him go and change.
  4. Crying every time you go out on the town and get a little too drunk.
  5. Asking him what he thinks about where his career is headed… while you’re having sex.
  6. Making him religiously sit through episodes of the Bachelor and Married At First Sight.
  7. Throwing him constant questions about the different characters and why they’re having sex with each other or trying to kill each other while he’s watching Game of Thrones.
  8. Inviting yourself to his boy’s night out (admittedly, I do this all the time. What can I say, I love his guy friends…)
  9. Continually questioning the rules while he’s trying to watch his favourite sports team.
  10. Flirting with other guys in front of him.
  11. Making constant remarks about your weight and the fact you’re going on a diet.
  12. Checking with him that everything is alright between the two of you… every 30 minutes.
  13. Asking if you can have some of his dinner – despite earlier saying you weren’t hungry.
  14. Arriving home drunk and then trying to seduce him by being all sexy – except you’re about as sexy as Mike Myers in Austin Powers.
  15. Ask him when he last went to the gym… while he’s eating dessert.
  16. Make him take 100 selfies with you, look at them, and then ask him to take 100 more pics of you just on your own.
  17. Questioning his mother’s life choices.
  18. Questioning his life choices.
  19. Messaging him when he’s out asking when he’s coming home. And then sending 20 more messages when you don’t hear back from him.
  20. Comparing yourself to Taylor Swift on the reg because one time he mentioned he thought she was cute… and then asking him if he thinks she’s cuter than you.
  21. Telling him what he’s doing wrong in bed.
  22. Laughing at his sex faces.
  23. Chucking out his favourite t-shirt. You know… the one with holes all through it.
  24. Asking him to reenact the scene from Dirty Dancing while you’re at his friend’s wedding.
  25. Constantly bringing up a disagreement you had… three years ago.
  26. Putting your cold feet on him.
  27. Discussing having a “hall pass” when you’re just about to go on a hen’s party.
  28. Clipping your toenails while watching TV on the couch.
  29. Popping his back pimples when he’s lying unsuspecting in bed.
  30. Filming him for your Insta Stories even though you know he hates it – and then laughing at them while you watch them over repeatedly.