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15 Weird AF Things About Australia

Australia just hosted a festival for people to sit around and say ‘wow’ like Owen Wilson and to be honest, I’m not surprised that not only was this a real event, but that people turned up for it. Australians have a knack for taking the weirdest shit and making them a part of our normal lives…

Just like sitting around saying ‘wow’ – here’s 15 weird AF things you’ll come across if you make the journey down under. OR, things you can probably relate to if you’ve had the red-hot joy of growing up with them.

#1 Our love for giant things that no-one really asked for…

The Big Banana, The Big Potato, The Big Prawn and, as a girl from Tamworth, my personal fave, The Golden Guitar. We don’t really know why this is our way of paying homage to things but we’ll stop off for a photo anyway.

#2 Our weird habit of ‘nicknaming’ everything…

Even if it’s not any shorter to pronounce. Footy = football. Footy = rugby (….still football).

#3 Or just our language in general…

Such as turning mundane nouns into verbs and knowing exactly what it means – eg; ‘Get trolleyed (drunk)!, Did you root (bang)? Are you going to dog it (ditch it)?’.  We’re a classy bunch.

#4 So classy we gifted the royal family a baby crocodile named George…

In honour of baby George’s birth we, as a country, gifted the royal family a baby crocodile. Prince William and Kate Middleton also got gifted a pair of crocodiles for their engagement.  Because what’s better than one giant snapping-swimming-dinosaur-monster? Two of course. Lucky gits.

#5 Our love for putting absolutely anything on top of a piece of deep-fried chicken… The weirder the better…

I kid you not I went to a Surry Hills pub last week that was offering a chicken parmigiana with eggs benedict on top.. Complete with hollandaise sauce. Am I wrong in saying this is too far?

#6 Shark sirens…

I don’t know if this is classified as weird or scary but we have actual sirens on our beaches to let us know when there’s a shark about…let that sink in.  #straya

#7 Our fifty-cent coin…

You probably wouldn’t pay attention to this if it’s something you’ve grown up with, but take my word when I tell you – our 12 sided masterpiece is fucking weird.

#8 We’re actually proud of Bundaberg rum…

#9 And Vegemite…

I don’t think I really need to say why these are both weird ‘delicacies’ to be proud of.

#10 Making pretty serious affairs into household idioms…

‘Do the Harold Holt’ (to go missing/leave).  Our Prime Minister went missing for christ sakes and we use it to describe our disdain for our mate smoke-bombing at the pub.

#11 Our patriotism for Ned Kelly…

Controversial I know but seriously, look the dude up… He was no Robin Hood.

#12 Our obsession with #fitspo #health …

We’re a country that gave fairy bread, literally grains of artificially dyed sugar on white bread, to our kids as an afternoon snack and now we harp on about sugarfree/dairy-free/life-free like our parents didn’t live like this.

#13 Pen licenses…

We actually used to strive in primary school to be able to be trusted to move from a led pencil to a pen and get a little licence card for it.

#14 The mistrust has now been converted to bar lockouts…

As adults, we can’t be trusted to drink responsibly and enter a bar after a certain time because we were getting too wild.

#15 We as a nation think putting down four litres of $10 wine from a silver sack hanging from the clothesline is funny.. #14 is probably fair…

Ahh dear… I could go on for days. Australia; from towns built underground to swearing at each other to show endearment, you’re weird AF but we wouldn’t have it any other way!

Words by April Murphy.  

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