We’ve all seen them – those beautiful Instagram girls flaunting perfect figures beneath their crop tops and bike shorts while captioning the post with mentions of their recent “healthy” meal packed with activated nuts and freshly squeezed juices. But despite all the bottles of OJ and bags of salted peanuts consumed, this washboard stomach seems to be less flat and toned and more a little lumpy and soft. 🤔🤔
Turns out that those fresh juices also come loaded with as much sugar and calories as a soft drink (and we’re not talking about the diet ones here), and that unless you’re behaving like a bird when it comes to your nut snacking – they ain’t going to be making you slim anytime soon (just a quarter of a cup of almonds contains 132 calories).
So while I’d already crossed off my “healthy” list all the fun things like salad with dressing, muesli bars, muffins, cereal and now orange juice and nuts – research tells me that if I’m serious about looking svelte in my swimmers, there are a few more things from the diet that need to be going to the banned foods list…
#1 Tuna Salad
I’m sorry – don’t the words “tuna” and “salad” just spell “EAT ME ALL DAY AND YOU WILL BE BABIN’ IN NO TIME”??? Apparently not. Yes, tuna and salad are technically healthy on their own – but the mayo that gets whipped into the tuna is far from diet-friendly. Damn you people, damn you.
#2 Protein Balls
As someone who just went out and bought two big boxes of protein balls to kickstart my diet – I’m a little devastated by this discovery. While we can kid ourselves all we like that these bad boys are super nutritious – the reality is that many tend to be high in fat. And despite being small in size, they pack quite a punch when it comes to the amount of energy they contain.
#3 Acai Bowls
Acai the fruit is quite healthy on its own, but unfortunately when it gets teamed with sliced banana, granola, the fruit juice/almond milk used to make the puree etc – it can add up to be the equivalent of 12 teaspoons of sugar. Eek. But think this one can stay on the weekend treaties list. A gals gotta have some fun out there…
#4 Avocado Toast
It looks so pretty on your Instagram feed, but despite being packed with healthy nutrients and antioxidants – a single avocado has more than 350 calories. Have this in moderation if you’re looking to lose weight… too much of a good thing ain’t good for you baby.
Last year I went on a strict diet for a little bit and pretty much only ate three things: protein, salad and yoghurt. Except it turns out that the yoghurt part may have been better replaced with a different “healthy treat”. With probiotics and good bacteria making me think I was being such a good girl – yoghurt is packed with added sugar and high-fructose corn syrup. Bugger.
Sashimi gets the tick, sushi often does not. Tempura, Japanese mayo and the typical two tablespoons of sugar and two tablespoons of rice vinegar used per two cups of sushi rice make this delicacy sneakily bad for you.
If you’re having this with full cream milk and icecream, then you can add as much fruit and kid yourself all you like – but that’s a milkshake, and we all know milkshakes don’t really bring all the boys to the yard. They bring all the junk to your trunk (and not in a good way).